Amateur Sex Archive

This dude is so totally fucked…and not in a good way. He is learning that lesson we should learn as kids playing outside in the neighborhood…

Never get in the middle between two dogs fighting over a bone !

The Wedding Crashers….helluva funny movie, especially how the Will Ferrell character takes his part even further by crashing funerals to get laid….

I dont know where sexaholics anonymous meets but if there is such a thing sign me up!  Picture it man….a room with a bunch of horny chicks who cant stop themselves from having sex.  You may not help them achieve their goals but you can help each other achieve some fun.

Yknow those pamphlets you get about hotels when on holiday and the different ameneties that you get at each one…?

Now THIS is what these pamphlets need.  Naked chicks portrayed for your pleasure, guaranteed open willing and waiting on every bed when you arrive.

You ever go to use a public phone or someone’s cell and think hmmm wow this is warm or damp…
Maybe we shouldn’t wonder about these things…gee the pool water seems warmer…see what I mean?

The wonderful world of the internet…nowhere else can you experience so many anal retentive geeks getting hung up on details that just dont matter….

You can just picture this dude ending up dead for hassling these chicks’ pimp for his money back and not letting it go….and to have passed up a couple big titted fuck-toys like this he deserves the bullet in the head he’s going to get.

Dude this guy shouldnt be at the theater watching porn he should be in the damned movie himself. Like seriously if a chick wasn’t scared off by it she would be all over it and there’s obviously room for more than one….porn producers dream come true as well as slutty porn stars dream come true…whatta waste.

Now you would think that by all appearances John is being rewarded for all those charitable works…

What isn’t mentioned is that John swindled all of those charities and he is being punished.  You see that pussy he is excitedly getting jammed in is one of the skankiest anyone has ever seen and he is cursed to his new life of cheesy repugnant pussy forever…or till he dissolves in one.

Yknow…a lot of whacked out fucked up shit happens in wars…

You gotta wonder what the army with the red pennants would be thinking when this “bomb” drops….

Thank god the screenwriters strike is over and viewing can get back to normal crap again…I shudder to think what would happen if our oh so brilliant porn writers ended up on strike. This is what we would end up with……..a buncha virginal geeks trying to break into writing jobs….cept I bet most actresses in [...]

Some people just don’t know how to make the best out of a bad situation…. Like this chick is all regretting her permanent tattoo…sure it may not be what she wants but I betcha she’s a shoe-in for a part on the Vagina Monologues now.